The power of unexpected kindness

By Jan S.

I first learned about Postcards to the Front through my good friends Helen and Jean-Michel. They asked if I’d be interested in helping to promote the cause by jointly organizing an event in the Village of Merrickville, Ontario, where I live (population approx. 1,600 in Merrickville/Wolford).

Here was an opportunity for me to do something, small as it was, to support those in the Ukraine fighting for freedom; freedom that I am fortunate to have. It was also a wake-up call. It seems to me that what is happening to Ukraine could happen anywhere; to wit, the Canada/United States situation right now, as well as other escalating global challenges.

Forty years ago, Helen and I became friends while working on environmental issues.  A few years later, when writing her Masters thesis about Polish survivors of deportation and exile in WWII Soviet labour camps, she asked me to read/edit it (a rather amateurish edit on my part!). It was an eye opener. It made me realize that I was leading a rather naive and entitled life. I had never fully considered the turmoil that first and second-generation Canadian immigrants had faced. Nor had I studied war and its effects, and the nature of the politics that had brought or that led newcomers to Canada.

I remember wondering why fate had given me the opportunity to read Helen’s thesis. Sometimes, I have learned, fate sends us information out of the blue. It can be a hard lesson. Or perhaps a person we meet, a book we read, or an experience. At the time, we don’t necessarily realize its purpose because it doesn’t relate to our present reality. But we know instinctively that it’s important and we tuck it away to perk in the background of our lives knowing that someday down the road (sometimes quite a long way down the road!), we will understand. That’s the “aha” moment where the purpose of the past reveals itself.

So here and now – some 40 odd years down that road of friendship – I find that Helen’s thesis and my deeper knowing of her and Jean-Michel, has become a segway for the beginning of a deeper understanding of what is now happening in Ukraine.

It has personalized the issues. It made me “feel”.  It made me think, and that brought words and action. Action to support Ukraine.

I am but one artist, living in a village of artists. The first thing I did when we decided to do something to support Ukraine was to create “Postcard Polina”; an eight-foot mannequin holding up postcards, inviting passersby to write messages of support to Ukraine’s Defenders. I installed her in the courtyard entrance of a local café that we affectionately call “The Bean”. It’s a bit of a hub in our village where locals and tourists alike sit and enjoy a coffee, and feel part of the village, tapping into whatever is ‘going on’. 

I left baskets of postcards and instructions in the café inviting anyone who wished to pick up a card and write to the front-line Defenders of Ukraine. Outside, Polina did a great job for about a month to let people know the latest going on and to draw them in to write cards.

A friend at our local print shop, Coba Studios, donated promotional materials and postcards as well as gave advice and suggested various supportive contacts. With Kristina, another friend, we posted promotional information throughout our village and other surrounding villages, as well as provided materials to community businesses. Our local schools were sent a background letter, postcards, and instructions. The students created and wrote the first batches of incredible heartfelt messages to Ukraine’s Defenders. My friend, Rhonda, was an enthusiastic hands-on helpmate with this project.

Next, we tapped into a popular postcard event held each year at our community centre, the annual Eastern Ontario Postcard Show. It’s a huge draw that sees people coming from larger cities, such as Ottawa, Toronto, and Montreal. The organizers graciously set us up with a couple of free tables in the entrance hallway. A few vendors donated postcards and provided Helen and Jean-Michel with contacts for other postcard writing events.

The following day, our Canadian Legion Branch 245, a great all-around community service organization, opened up their hall for an informational talk and chat, as well as for more postcard writing. The Merrickville Lions Club (another top community service group) generously purchased a supply of international stamps for shipping the written postcards to Ukraine.

The success of our endeavor was due to the generosity of the people in our village who helped make this event possible and who took the time to write messages of hope and support to the front-line Defenders of Ukraine. And, of course, to our friends, Helen and Jean-Michel.

I will admit that it was a hard thing for me to write my first postcard. What do I say?

I started by imagining myself in their shoes:  at the front, facing fear, uncertainty, death and devastation, stress and grief, while missing and worrying about loved ones and the future. What would I need to keep me going?

These things came to mind:  words to reinforce strength, determination and purpose; words that offer continued hope for peace and freedom; encouragement for defending against tyranny; perhaps something visual to dwell on for a moment’s respite from stress; and, finally, knowing that there are people in the world who watch and who care.

Now, almost every time I write a postcard, I think of something new. I keep the messages uplifting. I’d like to send jokes, but I don’t know how they would translate, so I’m now looking for cartoon and picture messages without text.

Of course, it has helped to access the Tips and the Ukrainian phrases pages on the Postcards to the Front website. The monthly newsletters are also helpful with information and insight.

I imagine that when a Defender receives my card, they might find the language barrier frustrating; although, Helen and Jean-Michel assure me that most Ukrainians have some English proficiency. I just need to remember to print. Not handwrite.

My sincerest hope is that my postcard messages give Defenders some comfort and even reinforcement to carry on for another day, knowing that we – somewhere far away – care. Knowing that they are not alone. I hope my cards offer a moment of respite; something visual to dream on.

If you ask me why I think a project to send messages of support to Ukraine’s Defenders is worthwhile, a few thoughts come to mind.  For example, you might wonder, why Ukraine and not other countries? Friendship, empathy, and need, come to mind, as well as place and time. It just feels right. Right now.

I also like to think that the groundswell of postcard writers (people in other countries also participate in the project) lets our governments know what is important to the people. Ukraine matters. We care.

Another reason (by extension): my father was a rear-gunner in the Royal Canadian Air Force in WWII.  It wounded his mind, body and soul though he never spoke of it. I can never forget his suffering, and I must never take for granted the sacrifices that Defenders make on our behalf.

I continue to encourage others to write messages of support to Ukraine’s Defenders. I believe, that “Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human change.” – B. Kerrey.

I would add: unexpected kindness is also an underrated agent of “psychological well-being”.

I also experience some positive well-being because I’m doing something, no matter how small it might be. Recently, Helen sent me a rare photo* showing a Postcard Polina arriving at the frontlines (in the left box). I imagine that not everyone gets to see and feel the impact of their postcard arriving at the front and landing in the hands of Defenders. When I saw the photo … goosebumps … and my fist shot straight up into the air. And my mind said ‘More! We need to send more. They deserve more’.  Well, I can do!_____________________________________________________________________

*Editor’s note:

We wrote about Postcard Polina, named after a Ukrainian friend, Polly, in our April 2024 newsletter. Here’s Polly, sheltering during a bombing in Odesa, Ukraine, with her mother, and her cat and her dog, holding the postcard named for her.

No action is too small if it helps make the world a better place for our children.

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Some of the many packages in which Postcard Polina traveled to the front lines.

Tell others about this project. Ask family and friends to write cards. Involve your children and grandchildren. Defenders especially like postcards with drawings from children.

Need cards? Write to us at postcardstothefront.canada@gmail.com. FREE!

Not sure how to get started? Check our “How to” page, and our Ukrainian phrases page. Want to organize a group of family, friends or others to write postcards? We have a page with suggestions about How to Run a Postcard-Writing Workshop.

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